#2047: Bladrum

It annoys me greatly that kitchen knife blocks make it hard to select the right implement (especially at times of crisis, such as when I’m cooking).

Even a transparent block makes it hard to see which blade is attached to which handle.

Today’s invention is a block which contains a rotating magazine in which the blades are stored.

A cook can say ‘paring’, ‘bread’, ‘peeling’, ‘carving’ etc to the block’s microphone and its processor will rotate the barrel until it aligns with the single handle, attaching the right blade to it.

There is only one handle to grab, thus minimising culinary stress.

This might also be adapted for use in operating theatres or motor garages.

#2046: Fireject

Today’s invention is an ejector seat apparatus for single-seat jets.

As the pilot ejects, the trailing edge of the seat physically breaks a fuel pipeline, causing the plane to be filled with explosive liquid.

This will ignite and destroy the plane in an intense aerial conflagration.

The effect would be to avoid casualties on the ground which might be caused by a large piece of debris.

It also limits the amount of secret information about the plane’s construction which might be gleaned from such remnants.

#2045: FlightSuit

Body scanners in airports don’t have a great press. Everyone assumes that they will be used to broadcast images of their less-than olympic physique, for the amusement of the general public.

Today’s invention is to make some positive use of these scans.

Anyone passing through such a machine would have the right to have the imagery sent direct to their tailor or favourite online store.

This would allow the busy jet-setting class to travel informally dressed and have a perfectly fitting suit chosen or made for them by arrival time at their destination.

(Also, are body dimensions currently used as a form of biometric identifier? This would make it much harder to travel on a false passport).

#2044: UnJamber

People in crowds can get hurt when trying to force their way through doorways, eg to escape from a burning building.

Today’s invention is a doorway which reacts to the pressure of a crowd.

In the diagram on the left, the people are jammed in the doorway.

In the right hand image, the door and sidewalls have begun to oscillate slowly backwards and forwards over a small amplitude, thus jiggling the people free from the jam, like sand in an egg timer.

An electric motor would first expand the room, freeing a small number of people, before returning to the normal configuration and repeating the process.

(My eldest daughter has just pointed out that the oscillation might instead be of the door jambs alone, in the plane of the wall).

#2043: AuctioneeRed

People seem to bid more aggressively for items with a red background.

Today’s invention is a related development for online auctions.

Items up for sale would appear in your browser initially on a white ground.

If you find your bid is say 30% less than the top bid, the item will now appear in your browser against a background that has been made 30% redder.

This encourages you to bid in proportion to the extent that your bid is short of the current highest.

#2042: BeerBeads

Every advertisement for beer shows the bottles covered in condensation.

It makes the drink look much colder and more enticing for having just emerged from the fridge.

Today’s invention is therefore to create beer bottles which have apparent condensation droplets moulded into the surface (whether glass or plastic).

This makes even bottles sitting on an unchilled shelf seem much more attractive to a thirsty shopper (and could also be applied to lesser drinks).

#2041: AltShot

I’m amazed by how many, high-end cameras are used purely to take the obvious, walk-up snapshots of well-known scenes.

Today’s invention makes use of those advanced cameras -which can usually connect to the Internet.

When one approaches any given location, your camera would be told about the positions from which local photos have been most frequently taken.

If you are about to use your expensive, artistic photographic tool to replicate a scene taken by 2,000 others that day, you would receive a message to that effect.

You would also get some directions to a less popular viewpoint, as well as extra suggestions such as ‘try a different height/ filter/ foreground subject/ lens’ etc.

#2040: RollingMean

Amongst the many other weird law and order measures in force within the UK, we have sections of roadway with ‘average speed’ limits. If you exceed that average, over a given distance, you get a fine.

Today’s invention is a modification to the standard speed trap detector.

This senses an average speed limit section of road and calculates the realtime speed limit which you have to observe at any moment so as to avoid exceeding the overall average.

If eg you have driven like a snail over the first 80% of the restricted section, then you should see a massive number indicated for the speed limit over the remainder.

Without other traffic in the way, this would make a prolonged stretch of such road much more entertaining to travel.

#2039: Nibbowl

The latest research on eating shows that multiple pieces of food are more satiating and rewarding than an equicaloric, single-piece portion.

Today’s invention is therefore a transparent plastic wedge-shaped segment, used for storing bitesized pieces of food in the fridge.

The wedges can be extracted from the fridge, or filled from a saucepan, and clipped together to form a varied plateful.

Each segment has an airtight lid. Eating involves opening only a few at a time.

Since one will feel full after opening and eating only a subset of segments, any unopened ones can be re-chilled for use later.

The segments which have been emptied can then be dumped in the dishwasher.

#2038: SkinSchemes

Imagine if cars, planes etc were spray painted in colours which matched the surface stress or fluid velocities which numerical models predict.

Today’s invention is a spraypaint shop with whose robots can interpret the FEA or CFD design imagery for a given model and reproduce those patterns in paint.

The colours used on a given vehicle or other product need not be garish but could come from a restricted palette as chosen by the buyer -thus making one’s car or bike look unique -and ubertechie at the same time.