#2077: FagFear

I’m strongly against smoking: it killed my mother.

Having said that, I really don’t want to have to share my visual surroundings with people who are carrying cigarette packets with gruesome images of gum damage and rotting lungs etc.

This imagery is supposed to discourage the use of tobacco, but if anyone in government were serious about cutting the related costs of healthcare, the price of a cigarette could be easily set at £300.

Until then, today’s invention is a slip-on cover for a standard sized pack of cigarettes. It would be plain in colour.

I’d also recommend pasting any ghastly images on the inside of the lid, so that every passing child isn’t subjected to this disturbing health porn propaganda.

#2076: SightLine

I really dislike travelling when I can’t see where I’m going.

Today’s invention addresses this issue for train customers.

The carriages run on a track which is deliberately curved. This would make journeys longer by a factor of Pi/2 and allow only slower moving trains, but the attraction of facing forward is not to be underestimated.

In addition, seats would automatically swivel so that passengers would always be facing forward (as they look ahead out the windows along lines like the red, dotted one shown).

#2075: Eyesky

Today’s invention is advertising hoardings which are moored in the sky (using large barrage balloons).

These are designed to be visible to many passengers aboard planes as they take off and land.

Seeing these ads, when emotionally excited by such manoeuvers, will make it much more likely that the targeted consumers would buy the products in question on emerging into the terminal.

#2074: HeliJect

Today’s invention is an ejection seat which has a small autogyro rotor built in (rather than a parachute).

This allows for a highly reliable descent which is more controllable and steerable than a parachute would be.

It also removes the uncertainty about whether a chute will open.

A version with a small power unit (and an extending tail rotor) would provide an even more effective escape mechanism.

#2073: Feelback

My computer desktop is a flat surface which replicates the uniform, physical nature of the screen itself exactly.

Today’s invention is a way to introduce more interest and feedback from items on the desktop and thus add extra engagement with elements on one’s computer screen (assuming it’s not a touchscreen).

Each window, border, icon, etc would have a defined depth and texture.

As I run my cursor across a desktop item, the cursor would shrink or expand noticeably, according to whether it was defined to be set more deeply or less deeply into the screen. Bringing items to the ‘front’ would make the cursor bigger when subsequently moving over them.

Secondly, the machine would emit a different sound as the cursor was traversing a screen element labeled rough than over one identified as smooth.

These parameters would be linked to the local visual pattern so that a cross-hatched area would make a rasping sound whilst a glassy, reflective region would cause the cursor to apparently make either a gliding, swishing noise or perhaps the squeaking sound of a dry finger on glass.

#2072: Boometric

Today’s invention is a program to optimise the strength of a telescopic crane.

When using such a crane either fully (1) or minimally extended, the loading allowed will be well defined. I’ve often seen them used in configuration (2), however, which seems like it has potential to damage the mechanism (unless it’s so over engineered as to be much more costly than it need be).

The program envisaged would, for a given intermediate reach, work out p,q,… etc which would minimise the maximum bending stress in the booms.

#2071: AleRTA

When you have just been involved in a car accident, everyone within range will be shaken up.

It can take minutes, even if no-one is hurt, to get around to deploying warning triangles upstream and downstream of the scene.

Today’s invention is a flexible, glass fibre mast, resembling an old fashioned CB radio aerial, which extends upwards, driven by a motor to a height of say 5m above a vehicle. It could be deployed manually when the hazard warning lights are activated or even automatically when the car suffered a sudden impact.

This would be topped by a flashing light to indicate an accident to oncoming vehicles in either direction.

A more advanced version would allow for several independent masts in case the vehicle had partly or wholly overturned.

(Their batteries might well be isolated from the main unit in order still to operate even if the car was badly damaged. Alternatively, the masts could be stored in a bowed configuration, requiring them only to be released to hoist the warning lamp(s)).

#2070: DivertDrop

When a parachutist nears the ground he or she may be heading for something unfortunate, such as a tree or a rooftop.

Today’s invention allows some last-minute diversion from these hazards to occur.

It consists of a harpoon gun attached to the jumper using a strong cable. This is wound around a small winch attached to the chute.

The parachutist would fire the harpoon at the ground, away from the hazard and then switch the winch on, dragging him to a safer landing.

#2069: Roadrive

Imagine a future when electric vehicle motors are very common and therefore comparatively inexpensive.

Since most journeys which people make are familiar, they can choose a motor/gearbox/battery unit, from a selection of say five modules which come with the car, which is the best for the trip they are about to make.

This would provide the optimal combination of range and economy and would simply slot into one’s vehicle before each departure.

#2068: Chewser

There are lots of diet-assistant apps and many which will propose recipes based on what’s in your fridge.

Today’s invention is a diet app which allows you to scan in labels on food in the (now) usual way but which then says

“You have had 40% of your daily carbohydrate allowance, 10% of your fat allowance and 3% of your protein requirement…so you can have any of the following items for your next meal…”

These items could be products in the databases of whichever stores the original scans came from.