#1525: LiquidLid

I’m very keen on using disposable fountain pens. I like the line quality and don’t care if the odd pen or two goes missing (due to increasing absent-mindedness).

This problem extends to frequently leaving a pen down without its cap and then finding that the ink has solidified.

Today’s invention is therefore a fountain pen which gradually recaps itself, using a mechanism like these bathtoys.

If you put the cap on the non-nib end when writing, the string just pulls taught.

Leaving the pen down uncapped results in gradual recapping (after a period determined by shortening the string to one’s preference).

This also has the benefit that the cap is harder to mislay (It might actually be better if the string were replaced by a band like a spring-loaded tape measure).

#1524: StethoStereo

Today’s invention is inspired by watching people share earbuds when listening to the same iPod.

When two or more medics need to listen to a patient’s interior (when one is being instructed for example) they can combine their stethoscopes so as to listen at exactly the same location.

They achieve this by one medic detaching their instrument’s head and plugging it into that of the other medic, as shown.

Naturally, this would provoke all sorts of status-related wrangling about which was unplugged etc, but the patient would certainly benefit from more precisely-controlled information flow.

#1523: FlockFender

Today’s invention represents another go at solving the bird-strike problem for passenger aircraft.

Each airliner would be equipped with a small UAV, capable of flying at speeds marginally greater than cruising velocity at medium and low altitudes. This craft could be highly streamlined, impact resistant and able to refuel itself periodically from the main aircraft.

The UAV would be released in flight and controlled by the aircraft’s steering system so as to fly directly ahead of it in areas with a moderate to high birdstrike probability.

A sufficient distance would be maintained between drone and aircraft so that any UAV malfunction could not damage the main plane.

The UAV would carry optical and perhaps acoustic sensors, in order to detect in advance the arrival of any errant avians. The two would fly close enough so that if the scout vehicle was actually hit (eg from the left), the aircraft crew would still have enough time to respond to advice to bear sharply right.

It might even be necessary to allow the drone to detonate its own small fuel load if it sensed that the flock was too big to be steered around.

#1522: DollsFace

I’m always surprised by the popularity of Barbie.

Today’s invention attempts to supply all such dolls (and even ‘Action Figures’ with a bit more emotional depth).

It consists of a rotating head with two facial expressions.

If you want to play a game in which Barbie is irritated by Ken’s complete inability to commit, then all you have to do is turn her head beneath her blonde hairdo.

#1521: SweatShirt

Some people seem to have a problem with sweat, or at least sweat stains on their clothing.

Today’s invention relieves these delicate flowers of their embarrassment.

Users would wear a pale shirt during eg exercise. This would reveal a map of their personal sweat distribution.

Their next T-shirts could then be constructed with patches of material in these zones pre-coloured so that, when wet, they became indistinguishable from the rest of the material (eg a dark grey shirt would have lighter grey patches built in).

#1520: LockBlock

Today’s invention is a novel version of the humble brick.

This takes the form of a fired ceramic component with the geometry shown. It can be used in the normal way, enabling double-thickness walls to be constructed with integral, and therefore stronger, cross-ties between them.

This design uses less mortar, spreads stresses more evenly and, in the event that a single brick is actually needed, can be cut to size, as usual.

#1519: Sidesteps

We apparently see stairs as being significantly steeper than they actually are.

Everyone is being urged to do more exercise but they are always going to be dissuaded by stairs which look formidably steep. This effect lessens as you get nearer than 50m or so.

Today’s invention is to incorporate stairs in buildings which are placed at 90 degrees to the approach direction.

This removes the illusion of a hard ascent and may significantly improve people’s determination to avoid the lift.

#1518: UnMEme

Now that we are all connected via ‘small world’ communications networks, it’s increasingly difficult to stand out from the crowd.

Once you adopt some new product or behaviour, everyone you know, and everyone they know etc., is immediately able to mimic you.

That may be a compliment and no real problem for the innovative, but it’s irritating. Some things that are hard to copy allow this viral memetics to be resisted.

Ringtones are an example. Today’s invention is a ringtone which consists of your own voice saying “Excuse me I have a call.”

This avoids annoying everyone within earshot (much less intrusive than music) but it would have to be said anyway and thus saves the owner some effort (whilst allowing your incoming calls to be distinguished from others’).

It also removes anyone’s incentive to copy, even if that weren’t difficult to achieve.

#1517: Localterations

When editing a document, I often make changes to a large number of different sections in rapid succession.

Then I may realise that one of the sections modified was actually better in an earlier incarnation, or contained useful information, now deleted.

Choosing a global ‘undo’ option doesn’t help, so today’s invention is a tool which allows me to highlight a region of the document and click back in time locally to reveal the full sequence of historical updates.

#1516: Footbrake

Learning to rollerskate was a pain: literally. Making a tailbone landing on concrete always limited my childhood enjoyment of the activity.

Today’s invention is therefore skates (or skateboards) with brakes.

Inside each wheel would be a small drum brake powered by a spring which would be wound up by a learner skater’s normal forward movement. The brakes would be fitted with a wireless receiver.

The user’s mobile phone would then allow these brakes to be actuated by releasing the springs progressively, in response to a particular key press.

This would allow discreet control of the deceleration, hiding one’s Learner status (and also potentially giving even expert skaters an extra ‘handbrake turn’ facility).