#1298: TrackBackup

Whenever a tracked vehicle has its tracks damaged, the crew are left vulnerable.

Today’s invention is therefore to equip such a vehicle with some road wheels which, when a track breaks, are capable of running directly on the ground.

These would each have independent motors, for maximal survivability.

The speed of movement might be very slow and uncertain on soft ground but in many circumstances this would be sufficient to escape, since each of the motors could be driven in such a way as to provide for rudimentary steering.

#1297: ShirtSwap

Today’s invention is a new rule for professional soccer.

On committing a yellow-card offence, players would be forced to swap positions with a randomly chosen team-mate (or even one chosen by the opposition captain, the player fouled or the opposition crowd).

That might have the effects of reducing player specialisation and cutting the frequency of rule-breaking by prima donna players.

#1296: Injectorseat

I have wrenched my back several times getting a child into a childseat from outside a car.

Today’s invention is a childseat attachment which allows the seat to hang securely on the window frame of a car door. This lets a parent place their child in the seat without stooping and stretching.

The child is then belted into the seat and the door closed, allowing the seat to be detached, through the open window, through the very small distance onto the car seat.

The car door can then be reopened and the childseat attached to the car seat via the main belt in the usual way.

#1295: LandingSight

I am paranoid about the safety performance of commercial airlines (despite their being statistically safer to travel with than driving to the airport).

If there is some kind of an emergency landing required, I’d really rather not have to rely on the pilot peering out the window in the hope of making a splashdown on a calm Hudson River.

Today’s invention is to provide pilots in an emergency situation with a visual display (based eg on Google Earth) which shows the real-time best landing site (taking into account fuel load, engine conditions, terrain flatness, population density and control systems integrity).

Flying over land, this would provide a moment-to-moment visualisation of where to put down.

In a real emergency, where flight crew were unconscious, this map could talk to the autopilot landing program and increase the chances of getting down in one piece. In a real disaster, it might help the plane to crash with minimal damage on the ground.

#1294: LiverGivers

Today’s invention links two of my pet themes, motorcycles and organ donation.

It takes the form of fabric badges in the shape of icon-ified body organs which can be attached prominently to a Motorcyclist’s leathers.

You can only wear badges corresponding to organs you have signed up to donate, in the event of a fatal road accident (corneas on one’s helmet, a liver badge on the torso). This might give some small pause for thought, when cranked over in a 70 MPH corner.

These would appeal to the bravado instinct of bikers, having something of the quality of medals, as well as helping to integrate them into societies where they are seen as a threatening sub-culture (ie Surrey).

#1293: BikeBubble

Another one I can’t seem to find in the great book of patents granted…

Today’s invention is a transparent, inflatable weather cover for a motorcycle (or other small, open vehicle (as a former winter biker, I remember how cold you can become, long before the conditions get too icy to ride).

This would take the form of a collection of connected bladders made of paddling pool material and wrapped around the bike (with a zipped access port for the rider to get on board). There would be a plexiglass screen at the front, attached to the bike, just for better forward visibility.

The cover would be inflated (hard enough to avoid buffeting at speed) by a small, motor-driven air pump (which could be used for the tyres as well). There might be vents at the front, for an air cooled engine, but it would work better as a cover-all for oil cooled machines.

When the bad weather abates, the pump would be run in reverse to ‘vacuum-pack’ the bladders tightly against the machine.

#1292: LeanAlign

Today’s invention is a way to make office chairs roll more smoothly across office flooring.

Conventional casters (with wheel centre trailing the vertical axis) always seem to end up pointing in the wrong direction. This causes carpet rucking and a massive amount of extra, irritating friction.

The new approach has the chair mounted on a shallow, conical base with casters, as shown.

To move in a certain direction, first rock in the opposite direction slightly, allowing the casters on the other half to rotate around under gravity to align themselves with the planned movement.

Rolling onto these then allows the chair to be supported and move unhindered on aligned wheels.

#1291: Shellmet

Today’s invention is a collapsible bicycle helmet.

It consists of an outer bag with hemispherical bulges moulded into it of different sizes.

Each bulge contains an aluminium boss bonded to a rubbery base. The bosses are of slightly different sizes so that they nest conveniently together when removed from the bag and fit into it for ease of carrying eg in a pocket.

The bosses’ rubber bases make contact with the wearer’s head and are held in place by a drawstring around the base of the bag.

In an accident, the bosses sustain damage and dissipate any impact loading across a wide area of the skull.

#1290: Tattool

Today’s invention is a software tool which performs two services to people interested in tattoos. This is inspired by the classic, if nonsensical, war movie “We Dive at Dawn” starring the ever plucky John Mills. A character is tricked into having an existing tattoo modified to include a longer, and inaccurate’ girl’s name.

Before getting a tattoo of a chosen design, the software displays on a screen the kinds of (larger) shapes to which eg a ship’s anchor, Egyptian ankh or the Dallas Cowboys’ logo can be most easily modified, should the wearer want, or need, an upgrade later.

Using the area, time required and location of any planned tattoo as guides, the software can also provide an estimate of the pain involved in such body modifications.

#1289: Prelasticity

When you drop a rubber ball on a hard surface it bounces to only a fraction of its starting height.

Today’s invention is a novelty device which overcomes that limit, by storing extra energy in a hidden, internal spring.

The ball is first squeezed, compressing the spring between the two hinged calipers which then lock ends together.

When the ball is dropped, the impact disengages the caliper ends allowing them to fly apart, react against the floor and provide an added upwards fling to the ball -beyond the bounce supplied by the rubber outer material.

(It may be that a version of this approach could be used to provide eg reactive armour for sports players and cyclists).