#264: Chewticles

Far be it from me to promote bad habits, but some people just can’t help biting their fingernails. When I was a child, our nails would be painted with bitter aloes in order to force us to stop gnawing our paws…didn’t really work though.

Today’s invention is a way to allow the bad habit but preserve the underlying nails.

atalija_Krznarić_nails612.jpg

Edible, false fingernails could be bought and attached (briefly) to one’s own nails. These would be long and patterned and available in a wide variety of delicious flavours (including both sweet and savoury versions; maybe even sugar free and containing toothpaste).

Although absent-minded or nervous nibbling would still take place, at least this would not involve consumption of anyone’s bodyparts.

Before there’s a storm of protest from the food hygiene lobby, consider how free from germs the average teenager’s fingers are whilst they chew them. This approach would even allow a layer of nasty-tasting stuff to be incorporated within the false nails after the tasty bit was finished and the underlying, real nails were in danger of being bitten.

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